Things Two Different Dudes Said To Me As I Walked the Dog Past The Bus Station:
1) “That’s one good lookin’ bitch. Hey, you pretty too.”
2) “That a face only a mother could love. I’m speakin’ about the dog. You fine.”
That was you? I was just kidding about the dog, btw. Bitch was nast.
Fire safety tip #46: Pile a bunch or flamable cardboard boxes in front of your only escape route. This will make your flaming exit much more exciting.
∞Did we really come through the Dark Ages for this?See, I call this “thinning the herd”.
Except the ones who need to be thinned aren’t the ones who died. I’ll be disappointed if the jury deliberates for more then 5 minutes on this one.
∞Something Awful Apologizes for Making Sarah Palin Resign
I need to spend more time reading Something Awful.
Helpful summer tip: keep some Mason jars filled with cold-brewed coffee on your fridge at all times. Shit is delicious and tastes different than regular coffee.
∞Modes, Quasimodes and the iPhone
This reminds me of something that drives me nuts in Windows: the way you can temporarily turn off caps-lock by holding down the shift key. In theory, this is a great feature. If you are typing a lot of capitalized letters and want to hit just one lower-case letter, you can easily do it by holding down shift.
In practice you rarely need to do this. What happens so much more frequently (to me) is you’ll accidentally have the caps-lock on, go to type a uppercase letter and have it end up lowercase. Thinking you just didn’t hold down the shift key you’ll backspace and try again. Only the second or third time through do you realize that caps lock is on, so you hit the caps lock key. Out of habit, you won’t hold down shift after hitting caps lock, typing yet another string of lowercase letters. Trying not to freak out you take a few deep breaths, lift your hands off the keyboard and carefully turn the fucking caps lock off.
GPOYCT
I’m at my great uncle’s house in Wisconsin or something. Chillin’ in the grass. I still like doing this.
∞In case you had any doubts that Glen Beck is the biggest asshole on Fox, here’s proof.
Glenn Beck Agrees US Needs Another Al Qaeda Attack To Protect Us From Immigrants? (via bdoernberg)
∞
