1. Unfortunately, the war on Christmas is a game Palin and O’Reilly and Fox News and the Family Research Council can’t lose. The more they complain about people saying “happy holidays” instead of “merry Christmas,” the fewer people will say “merry Christmas.” This will be held up as proof that the war on Christmas is real. But people like me aren’t replacing “merry Christmas” with “happy holidays” to be “politically correct,” as Palin insists in the introduction to her stupid book, we’re doing it because we don’t want people to think we’re assholes.


  3. hodgman:

I like your green stripe, Iowa.


    I like your green stripe, Iowa.

  4. liartownusa:

Babies Are Boring Billboard

Pretty much true


    Babies Are Boring Billboard

    Pretty much true

  5. ☛ http://gifq.co/I01hAOjv.gif
  6. We had some stressful times with Margaret. Before Rosemary was born I was prepping myself for a year or so of coming home to a grumpy mommy more evenings than not. But, oh man, Stephanie has been amazing this past month. Yesterday I got home from work and she was cooking dinner with a baby strapped to her while dancing around singing songs from Annie with Margaret. Every night I get home is pretty much the same. A house filled with three happy girls.

    I don’t know how she does it, but whatever it is Stephanie is doing is amazing.

  7. The 7 E’s of HOOKING UP

    A friend of mine posted a link to the 7 E’s of HOOKING UP. (don’t Google it, it’s just as horrible as you imagine). For the benefit of all the fellas here, I thought I’d post my own 7 E’s. Guaranteed to work, every time.

    1. Encounter: See a group of women
    2. Ejaculate: Whoops. I swear this has never happened before.
    3. Eliminate: Sorry ladies, cumming makes me have to poop.
    4. Estimate: I should be back in about 15 minutes, stay right here
    5. Effervescent: Grab yourself something fizzy to drink on the shitter
    6. Erotisize: Run into buddy in the bathroom. Boast about the moves you are gonna pull tonight.
    7. Emerge: Get the hell out of the bathroom. Your courtesy flushes did nothing.
  8. We are the fishes, the mightily mightily fishes. 🎶🎸

  9. Huuuuurrrrrr


  10. I obtained top secret video of Boston Dynamics next project: WildCat 3000